Confessions of a former wanna be princess..

The guest on Diane Rehm today wrote a book entitled "Cinderella Ate My Daughter." The discussion was about consumerism in America, the outrageous popularity of Disney Princesses; hence the title. I found myself wanting to read the book, which I still may, however then remembered I am a mom of boys. One of whom also loves princesses, and has told me that girls are luckier because they can wear dresses and can be princesses. The enlightened mother that I am, I sympathized with the frustrations he was experiencing and tried to explain societal norms around gender roles, etc. I then realized I was talking to an almost 5 year old, and he had moved on to the next topic of the day: chocolate chips. Anyway, I remember want to be a princess as a little girl. Lady Diana Spencer and Prince Charles became engaged when I was a wee kindergartner and married just before I turned 6. I was enthralled with the fact her name was so similar to mine. Surely, this meant I was destined for royal greatness too! The hours spent playing dress up, coming up with elaborate stories about meeting and marrying a Prince; it was a good time. If I were a mother of a daughter, would I try and distract her from the subject of princesses, Disney or otherwise? Probably not. I am kind of a crappy feminist I guess)
As a parent, we all have an ideal of how we would like to parent and how we will never stray from that ideal, and would children will turn out perfect, amazing and brilliant. The best in the world, of course. I planned to make all my own baby food, never allow them to watch tv, have them listen to classical music exclusively, and no fast food EVER. Well, I made some baby food, but good grief I have a full-time job in addition to being a parent. I had to cut myself from slack. The longer I am a parent, which I am still a real greenhorn, I realize that all my ideal plans, while they would have been nice, would have just ended up sucking all my attention and energy. My children watch TV... in moderation. They listen to whatever music they enjoy (minus stuff not appropriate for kiddie ears). They have tasted the products of McD's (notice I did not refer to it as food). They are still alive. And pretty damn happy.
So, here I find myself the mother of 2 boys. I never imagined that particularly, but at the same time I did not necessarily picture myself with only daughter's either.
If they want to wish to be a princess, no biggie.
I much prefer princess play to pretending to shoot people.

"unfriending" people

I don't like unfriending people on Facebook. Until today, I have done it 2 times. First: someone I wasn't sure about accepting a friend request was posting bizarre and inappropriate things on my wall. I figured it was just easier to unfriend her. She was not happy about it, but in the end was unable to ackknowledge she had been inappropriate and told me she had "meant well." Well, I did not agree. Second time, I did it really impulsively, I was angry over something and unfriended them without thinking it through. I later apologized for my rash choice, which she graciously accepted.
Most of my "friends" on facebook have very different points of view than me. I don't always like things they "like" or agree with their posts, but I am sure they feel the same way from time to time about me. Occasionally, I will respond to some posts, but generally try and refrain, because what it the point? My disagreeing will not make them change their point of view, any more than their opinion will change mine. Agree to disagree, you know?
Well today I did unfriend someone. Not rashly. Not because I was angry. I think it was a long time coming. For several years now this individual has sent me emails, most of them political in nature. I have largely disagreed with most things they sent, and after sending me a pretty nasty email comparing liberals to people who are mindless drones, I asked them to stop sending me emails political in nature and only send emails with updates on family. Today though, I guess what "broke the camel's back" was a post on her wall that was incredibly patronizing and derided the poor. I had enough I guess. If it makes me intolerant, I will own that. I have a pretty good sense of humor, but cruelty at the expense of others is just not okay. I don't think I need to try and be friends with someone who has such a blantent disregard for other peop

oops it has been a few days

Jonah is cutting 2 year molars. Since he is only 21 months old, this must mean he is advanced. Or precocious. He is talking a lot more.
Work has been either dead quiet or hectic! No happy medium this week. I think I will join in on blaming the full moon, which I missed seeing last night, by the way.
Jude is maturing so quickly, maybe he will go to kinder in the fall after all. Although, as I write this, he is not sleep and has a really stuffy nose. Poor kiddo.
I am trying to find plane ticket to MN that won't completely break the bank Ugh.
We are also now looking at buying a small acreage, then putting a manufactured home on it. Going to go and look this weekend, get an idea of cost. May be the best way to get what we want without having to move up another 100k or so.

could a "people person" sometimes not like people

Even though I am a pretty friendly person, I went into social work for pete's sake, sometimes I just don't like some people. You might be surprised who; it isn't always your garden variety jerk.
It become particularly challenging when the person you dislike is someone you cannot avoid seeing or running into. This is where my neurotic attempts to justify my dislike of them kicks in; I start to list all the reasons in my head why I dislike them, and thus, why others should dislike them too. I begin to get a superiority complex; compare myself to them and how they do not major up to my awesomeness.
What a load of crap, you know?
Anyway, sometimes people do things or act in ways we do not like. We need to get over it; our disliking of them is our responsibility, not theirs. I am not saying that it is not okay to dislike someone, or that we have to find some way to like everyone. Just own the fact you don't like someone, then move on. Of course, remembering the Golden Rule: "do unto others...."
Life is too short to get all in a snit over stuff like that.

Trying not to be uber mommy

So, for around a year now, I have been adamant about Jude going to kindergarten the fall of 2011. Lance disagrees. I have disagreed back. Back and forth. We talked about it again last night, and it seemed to finally click: Jude is not ready. He was a preemie, which did not effect him intellectually, he is almost average sized for his age, and physically on par developmentally with peers. He is, however, very clingy.
I knew that his preschool teacher would having conferences at some point this school year, so I asked her today when. I told her my husband had some concerns about him being ready socially and emotionally; she said "yes" nodding in ascent.
Sigh..... Oh.
Despite hearing something I did not want to hear, I was more prepared than I thought I would be to accept that fact. It probably did not hurt he promptly had a meltdown when I tried to leave (which he has not done in months!). Could I have had a better object lesson then that?
Anyway, going to kinder at 6 will not hurt him. If later, he needs to jump ahead a grade, great. If he stays with that class, no problem.
Now I just have to admit I was wrong.
Well, overly optimistic, in the least.
Which I did... via email. ;)

tired, yet wired

Contemplating so many things. Should we move to Minnesota? I really don't have enough info to answer that questions yet. It has been 25 years since I visited and Lance has never been there. The better quality of life is really tempting. I love Walla Walla, but it is ridiculously expensive. The wine industry has been both a blessing and a curse. Unemployment has not been as bad as other areas of WA, but cost for housing are not par with in median income. I don't really want to pay 300+ k for a crappy house on 2 acres. I can get a fantastic house on at least 5 acres with a lake and a barn in MN.
We are planning a trip the first week of April to just check things out and see if there are possibilities there. My favorite aunt lives there, and she is excited about the prospect of having family live closer to her I think. We are just going to go and check it out. While it would be good to see MN in winter, early spring will likely be really different than in WW, so it will still be a good indication of the climate adjustment we would have to make. Of course, their winter has been unusually harsh this year, and we have had more snow and cold than usual as well.
Why move when we both have good jobs, a comfortable home, friends, and family? Well, we would like a small (less than 10 acres or so) farm. Our oldest is approaching school age, so if we did make a change in location, we want it to be before he is too far into school. It could be partly related to me being closer to 40 than 30, and maybe I have a little bit of wanderlust. I don't want to feel like we have not explored possibilities out of complacency. Who knows what will happen, I am confident that we will do what is best for our family in the end; whether that be being patient for the right place here, or moving somewhere else.

A New Year

I don't like New Year's Resolutions, as a rule. People (mainly me) rarely follow them through to their intended goal. There are somethings I would like to do and change over the next year, however, but no more so in January than in June or July.
1. Lose more weight: well duh, what American women does not feel compelled to do this? While it is mainly vanity driven for me, it is also diabetes prevention and the fact I want to be healthy. I am going to have teenagers when I am 50, you know?
2. exercise more: see above
3. Put at least $500 a month in savings. For traveling, having an emergency fund, etc.
4. Grow a really cool garden.
5. Cook more, using the food we grow.
6. Read a lot.
7. Find some outlet for singing. One I don't find annoying. This may mean I sing a lot in the car.
8. Hang out with other people more. Not just at work. Make some new friends!
9. to be determined....

Resuming my original blog.

I have realized I have too many blogs. As a result, I do not really write much in any of them. I am closing condescendingelitistliberal.blogspot.com, namely because I do not have the time to read a bunch of other stuff about politics, and then blog my reaction to it. I will leave that to people who do. I also have given up writing chickwithbrainsrun.blogspot.com because I have yet to really train for a 5 k and when I do, I will chronicle it here.
This blog will include the mundane, witty, interesting, surprising, etc things that go on in my life. I will refrain from client related work stories, of course, because I would get fired if I did write about them. It will include stories of my pretty regular life: my kids, my spouse, my pets, my attempts to balance being a working parent, my thoughts on possible moving the Minnesota, our search for an affordable property we can do some hobby farming, my reactions to the stupid things people say, and occassionally, some schmaltzy rhetoric designed to try and persuade people to be more reasonable, i.e. progressive and liberal. Well, that last one may be a bit hyperbolic, but you never know....
Since I missed January 1st (I got the idea today. Whoops.) I will attempt to blog on a regular basis starting Jan. 2nd, 2011. I may blog daily, or several times a day, or go weeks without blogging.
I can pretty much guarantee I will post on the impending nuptuals of Prince William and Kate Middleton. It is not everyday a commoner becomes a princess. I will also blog about poop, as I have 2 boys and various pets, and well frankly, everyone poops. I will occassionally rant about the injustices I encounter, the cruelty I will never "get used to," and IF Sarah Palin runs for president, I will blog about politics. I may blog some about religion too, but since I am not a practicing anything, I will likely do this infrequently.